Tag Archives: object lesson
Kate Moss and a Cheap Chic Critique
Is it any coincidence that the most famous fairytale about vanity and self-deception is also about fashion? The Emperor’s New Clothes comes to mind often these days whenever a major designer or model launches a cheap chic clothing line.
Proenza Schouler opened a pop-up store earlier this year for their Target line, but you did not see it on Gastro Chic, because it sucked. I’ve never been a fan of Proenza Schouler, despite their heartwarming meeting-at-Parsons story and socialite connections. Take away the high-quality materials and hand stitching, and Proenza Schouler line isn’t much different from the run-of-the-racks clothing you’d find at Target. By 3pm, the only things left were cropped orange jackets and weird floral things in size 14.
But this didn’t stop Colette in Paris from carrying the line. Can somebody please pass the Kool Aid?
As for the Alice Roi collection for Uniqlo, when it is bad, it is very, very bad, and when it is good, it looks like anything else you’d find at Uniqlo. Here’s a nightmare in floral, right, and for a floral Alice Roi house dress, check out Racked. Mystifyingly, it was sold out by the time I arrived at Uniqlo. Couture designers seem to see doing a mass market line as an opportunity to take risks they would never take at a high-end level, in a “let them eat cake” sense. There’s a fine line between jolie-laide and just plain ugly, and many of them cross it.
This Alice Roi sack dress was interesting but not particularly wearable. The only things worth buying from Alice Roi’s collection for Uniqlo were the more conservative designs, like this safari-style top, below. And for that, why do you need Alice Roi?
Everything I needed to know about Madonna’s ill-conceived collection for H&M I learned by peering in the windows at H&M and seeing rows and rows of basic hoodies and sweatpants. They should have called it “Madonna Gym.”
Last week’s Kate Moss at Topshop at Barneys hullabaloo was best approached with cynicism. If it is possible for a blog to stalk someone, Fashionista did before this opening, posting a video, Kate Moss Speaks! In case you were wondering whether she has anything remotely of interest to say, no, she doesn’t. Nevertheless, Kate fans were in awe of the video, sent multiple comments, and drove traffic to the site. Barneys, Fashionista, and Racked all posted countdowns to Kate. Apparently, she is Santa Claus. Maybe even Jesus.
Is it any surprise that the line is a letdown after that? This may come as a major shock given her involvement with Pete Doherty, but Kate Moss is dumb as bricks. But it doesn’t matter. They’re like the stylish couple Woody Allen approaches in Annie Hall and asks for the secret to their happiness.
“Uh, I’m very shallow and empty and I have no ideas and nothing interesting to say,” she says.
“And I’m exactly the same way,” he says.
Forget about love. The fashion take-away from Annie Hall is, they’re still stylish! For better or for worse, you can have nothing interesting to say and still have style.
But not chic. Only an original like Isabella Blow can be truly chic.
I wasn’t one of the hundreds waiting in line at Barneys, but I did go up to the seventh floor around 1pm Wednesday to find…tank tops! Oh my God, tank tops! With buttons on them! They reminded me of… dare I say it? Another K word. It begins with a K and ends with a Mart.
There was no sign of the cool black windowpane dress that reminded me of…some other designer. Or the floral dress that was directly copied from Kate Moss’ wardrobe. I grabbed a ruched gray thing before anyone else could, but it wasn’t in my size. A salesguy appeared immediately and offered to pull it in my size from the display window.
I nearly fainted. Not only had a Barneys salesperson rushed to my service, but he had volunteered to mess up the pristine, Simon-Doonan-designed Barneys windows for me. Thrilled, I accepted. There was no way I wasn’t going to buy the Kate Moss thingie now. I was beginning to like this fairytale.
It wasn’t really the first time. I became obsessed with the Rodarte for Gap white trapeze top with pintuck pleats when I saw it on a friend who works for Marc Jacobs. It’s on its way to me now, being shipped from Gap in the mall at Lakewood, CA. No big deal. I just put in an hour of phone research on 1-800-GAP-STYLE and called five stores all over the nation when it sold out in New York.
So here are my spoils from Kate Moss for TopShop, below. I’m not sure if it’s a top or a dress, but it’s actually kinda cool. The detailing seems to be hand stitched. And there are none left anywhere in the world.
It may be mass delusion, but the quest for A-list style at D-list prices has unified fashion fanatics everywhere. The long lines, the months of anticipation, the inequality of demand versus supply: it’s the same kind of mania you see surrounding a Rolling Stones concert or a really big sample sale. In the end, who really cares whether it’s worth it or not? It’s all about the feeling of group participation in an otherwise merciless, every-woman-for-herself fashion world.
As for the Kate Moss for Topshop dress, I may be wearing the emperor’s new clothes, but that doesn’t take away the thrill of winning the hunt. As someone who beat out Kate fans across the country and in the U.K., all I can say is, How you like me now, sucka?
Posted in fashion
Tagged Barneys, East Village rants, Kate Moss, object lesson, Simon Doonan, TopShop
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TomTom
A microwave. A cellphone. A Blackberry. Sometimes a device can change your life. TomTom is one of those devices.
This portable GPS system was recommended to me by a friend before I left for LA. For a trip dedicated to finding random eateries in strip malls, it’s an invaluable tool – especially for a New Yorker who experiences a sort of disorienting agoraphobia outside Manhattan. GPS systems are nothing new, but this portable device is great for rental cars and has much more sophisticated features than built-in GPS systems. Just stick it on the windshield, and TomTom will detect where you are. Program in an address, and TomTom will direct you there with clear-cut color graphics and the voice of your choosing – a lady with an American accent, say, or a British dude.
Unlike Mapquest, TomTom actually tells you the best, most convenient way to get from A to B, taking into account travel time, the fastest routes – even traffic. It avoids snaking two-lane roads through mountains and farmland. (That was really helpful in Colorado – thanks, Mapquest…) If you’re a stranger in a strange land – in the U.S. or even Europe – you can even do a search, Google Maps-style, for “coffee” and find the nearest cafe. Or, if you know there’s a Target around somewhere, type in “Target,” and TomTom will find it.
As with the iPod, sometimes you don’t have to look far to find the next “killer app” in technology. This time, it’s right on the dash.
TomTom ONE
$299
just released:
TomTom ONE XL
new features: larger screen, real-time traffic services
$399
available at Radio Shack, Staples, and the Sharper Image
Car Culture
I spy… some sweet rides.
Ferrari outside Fred Segal
old-school sedan on Melrose
Ferrari on Robertson, later spotted at the Ivy
cars can’t be gay – can they?
how very Entourage
eagle wings on hood
white wall tires in Venice
retro futurism
vintage Bimmer
presumed car of the pod people
old-school sedan on Melrose
Ferrari on Robertson, later spotted at the Ivy
cars can’t be gay – can they?
how very Entourage
eagle wings on hood
white wall tires in Venice
retro futurism
vintage Bimmer
presumed car of the pod people
Bikes
Beach cruiser bicycles promise to be an even bigger fad this summer than last. The more practically inclined can opt for a mountain bike or a good old-fashioned Schwinn.
Many of these bikes are sold by Bicycle Habitat in New York and at BeachBikes.net in LA and San Diego. Most beach cruisers go for $350 or less.
bicycle by Firmstrong, based in SoCal
bicycle by Diamondback
Love the bikes in 1950’s colors.
looks like a Schwinn
Yes, people are friendlier in LA.
a windswept day on the beach
low rider
bicycle by Diamondback
Love the bikes in 1950’s colors.
looks like a Schwinn
Yes, people are friendlier in LA.
a windswept day on the beach
low rider
Playmate Necklaces
Today is Hugh Hefner’s 81st birthday. Happy birthday, Hef!
Playboy has been at the front of pop cultural consciousness this year, what with Anna Nicole Smith’s death and the Girls Next Door racking up ratings. A friend who works at Playboy (on the business side, ahem!) often wears this Playmate of the Month necklace. The more I saw it, the more obsessed I became.
Like playmates, the necklace comes in flavors of the month. It makes a great birthday present, not to mention an excellent present for oneself at only $24. If you have a brain to go with your boobs, it’s actually a little subversive.
Just like Playboy was – and is?
Playmate of the Month necklaces available on Playboy.com
The Hoax
The New York Public Library held a screening of The Hoax last night. Based on the true story of a writer who sold and wrote a fake autobiography of Howard Hughes, it’s a must-see for anyone who has worked in book or magazine publishing. The scenes at the McGraw-Hill publishing house in the early ’70s are hilarious, and Richard Gere excels as the manipulative, deluded, but still likeable writer Clifford Irving.
Speaking of hoaxes, there is no such thing as the Spa at Bellevue, featured in the April 1 entry on Gastro Chic. If you go to the famous New York psychiatric hospital looking for a spa, chances are they’ll check you in for other services.
This photograph from the entry is an actual photo of Bellevue.
These two are photos of the thermal baths in Budapest, Hungary.
Don’t feel silly if you were fooled. Of the hundreds of people who have visited the site recently, not one person contacted me to question the veracity of Bellevue, the state-funded psychiatric institution, opening a spa. Scary.
The Spa at Bellevue
Ever feel like your regular rub down just isn’t cutting it? A sixty-minute massage can be bliss – until you step out of the spa and back into the reality of endless work meetings and jam-packed 6 trains. Suddenly all the weight of the world – and the stress – is back on your shoulders.
Enter <a href=”
http://www.ci.nyc.ny.us/html/hhc/html/facilities/bellevue.shtml”>the Spa at Bellevue. Taking the trend of combining the medical sciences with the latest beauty treatments to the next level, this venerable, 271-year-old facility has quietly opened another branch to complement its world-renowned psychiatric department: a full-service spa. Styled after beautiful thermal baths in Russia, the sort that Anna Karenina may have visited after a particularly trying social season, the spa occupies a double-height back hall of the hospital with its own private entrance. The beautiful, old-world space has been converted into several interlocking pool areas.
A number of services are on offer. Sign up for a massage with one of Bellevue’s licensed talk-and-massage therapists. Using a combination of Shiatsu and Jungian treatments, these talented technicians dig deep to get to the root of your stress. 
The Spa at Bellevue utilizes the latest research to give you the best results: their most popular facial is a scrub that’s a mix of crushed minerals like mica, zinc oxide, and lithium.
So the next time you want to say, “Calgon, take me away!” remember that this wasn’t just an old advertising slogan but a bona fide cry for help. When you need to seriously chill out, it’s time to get serious about your spa.
<a href=”
http://www.ci.nyc.ny.us/html/hhc/html/facilities/bellevue.shtml”>The Spa at Bellevue
462 First Avenue at 27th Street
212-562-1000
Net-A-Porter Hot List
The spring trend report is in from Net-A-Porter. If you don’t know what Net-A-Porter is, by all means do your fashion homework. A few outtakes:
* mini dresses, especially Milly’s
* jersey
* florals
* retro-futurism
* silver accessories, especially shoes
Natalie Massenet & co. mention the Waverly Inn, all the way from London. They’re also betting on lucite heels? Let it not be so… Yet I’m afraid this online luxury site is almost always spot-on.
Net-A-Porter, The A to Z of What’s Hot Now
Go Long on White Trenches
Prediction: White trench coats, belted high on the waist with a full skirt, will be the It coat of the spring. They’re already making a splash as resort wear, and some New York women are breaking them out now during the unseasonably warm weather.
Pictured left is a white trench in the window of Coach on lower Fifth Avenue. Below is the Marc Jacobs version, available online at Bergdorf Goodman. The Marc Jacobs color is listed as “metallic beige,” but hey, it looks white to me.
Anthony Luciano Handbags
If I were thinking of dropping some serious change on a handbag, which, sadly, I am not, the first place I would look would be the display case just inside the north Fifth Avenue entrance of Bergdorf Goodman. The handbags of the moment always seem to end up in this spot, and right now it’s these $1500-and-up Anthony Luciano bracelet bags with wooden reproduction-vintage handles.
If you really want to play Audrey Hepburn this season, forget the damn black pants and make a beeline for Bergdorf’s. The bags are not available online, but a list of stores worldwide can be found here.
A stealth photo of the display case:
